Monday, October 29, 2007

An Open Letter to a Wounded Idealist

My dear friend, I love your heart. I love your passion and compassion, your fierce rejection of anything but truth. Your heart hates the effects of evil, and it will not let God off the hook. You have seen what this world can do to innocent people. There is no reason to hide your disappointment, or to temper your rage. You don’t allow yourself to be appeased with trite answers; you desire freedom from evil and hate. Your heart calls me to more; it keeps me honest and searching. You are a beautiful manifestation of the compassion and passion of God.

God also loves your heart. He made you to feel, and experience. He created your heart huge and powerful. You have a bigger heart than most people, but God made your heart to be bigger than you can imagine, and he is working even now to grow your heart. And God is not afraid of your heart. He is not afraid of what you will find when you follow your heart towards compassion, towards true justice and the true state of mankind. He wants more of you, not less of you.

Now, you say there can be no reason good enough for the pain and suffering that happens in the world. All the rape and killing of children. Starvation, tsunamis, earthquakes, dictators, children soldiers, ethnic cleansing. I agree with you. There is nothing I can come up with that could possibly make all of this worth it.

But I have hope that there is something more, something bigger and deeper than anything I can imagine. This is the promise of God that some days I get to believe and some days I don’t. This is what Paul was talking about when he said “I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us”. It must be amazing, whatever it is that will be revealed to us that can redeem the worst the world has ever suffered. The greater the evil, the greater the size of whatever can redeem it. You do not let God off the hook for the truth of evil. Do not let Him off the hook for the incomprehensible size of what He says will redeem everything.

You don’t have to believe it. Most days I don’t. But I do know that the one who promises me this also is the only one who surprises me. When I glimpse the face of God, using when I am singing in church, I am overwhelmed with what His presence says to me. The difference between what I know to be true and what I experience with God is so profound that it brings me to tears. Usually sobs and gasps and it becomes uncomfortable for those next to me. But somehow this brings me comfort. I pray that one day this will bring your beautiful heart comfort as well.


To all my readers who are also wounded idealists, where do you see yourself in this? Do not let me off the hook, but rather challenge my comfort.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Really?

These are beautiful images said in lovely ways but how much do they really hold? You mention the horrible atrocities people face in this world and then say "it is nothing compared to the redemption." What of this redemption? The child orphaned because his parent's were killed in the tsunami? Would you tell him to hold out and praise the hunger in his stomach because the redemption he will receive is much? What of the women dieing of AIDS in Zimbabwe because at the age of 12 she was raped and infected by her uncle. There are medicines available that would make the disease manageable, available, but not to her. Would you tell her to rest securely because her redemption awaits ten fold? Pay no head to the aches, the pains, the ostracizing that is bound to pour over your innocent head.

What answer does the God you glimpse on Sunday mornings while you sing songs of his goodness give for the real evils in this world? Could you hold onto hope in the face of legitimate despair?

stacy pietsch said...

davey, thanks so much for challenging, jeremy. i felt kindred to you and appreciated so much your questioning of this post.

thankyou for hoping, jeremy. i feel like you wrote this post to me. when you were bold to state the atrocities of this world i am confident you were not uttering them with piety and distance but rather to compassionately acknowledge they exist. From one who struggles daily to face a God who allows such evil to thrive, thank you for trusting. you understand that for me i must lean into my fury at God in order to be brought closer to him. the issue of suffering has many times provided way to end my relationship with God. every day it is an option. i need to hear more often that God made me this way and that he is not afraid of my anger and sense of betrayal every time i see his goodness so severely corrupted...

Derrick Fudge said...

Davey, I am so glad you brought this. I really do love your passion, and please don't hear I am saying anything that wants you to deny this longing for justice you have. I didn't mean to say that the suffering "is nothing compared to redemption". I am just saying that God says this, and God is mysterious to me. I would never say to the 12 year old girl that she should rest securely. I would tell her that I know God is huge and surprising and full of wonder. that is all. there is no answers, but I can rest in the wonder of God

Wax Artistic said...

It’s amazing that you are able to hold onto faith despite being horrified by these circumstances and the god that allows them. I admire that you are willing to wrestle with such issues and experience the genuine anger and frustration that results. Does a concession to “mystery” adequately reconcile God the Redeemer to a seeming God of Negligence and Callousness? The question is not rhetorical; I’m seriously curious.

Kimberly said...

Stac, your words are chilling to me.

"Leaning into our fury at God to find God...."

Thank you Davey, Jer, Stac, and Nick. I am eavesdropping on this conversation...and not sure where to go with my words.

Anonymous said...

There is no other way to accept the great gulf between what we know God to be and the evil we see in this world than to acknowledge that it is all a great mystery.

Great thoughts, Jer,

Derrick Fudge said...

To Nick

No, I don't think saying God is mysterious lets Him off the hook for His "Negligence and Callousness". I do think it makes me curious, though. I am not saying I really believe God will redeem everything, but I am open to it, and that is from his surprising grace in my own life